Strong Yet Struggling

As a Gen-X I can remember hearing the terms as I grew up: “Tough it out,” or “Big boys don’t cry.” These were the anthem of my generation as a man, and they still float about to this day. But Scripture paints a different picture, not of stoic silence, but of strong men who also struggle — and who cry out to God for help.

David, a man after God's own heart, wrote in Psalm 6:6,

I am worn out from sobbing. All night I flood my bed with weeping, drenching it with my tears. (NLT)

Elijah, after one of his greatest victories, collapsed under a tree and said in 1 Kings 19:4,

Then he went on alone into the wilderness, traveling all day. He sat down under a solitary broom tree and prayed that he might die. “I have had enough, Lord,” he said. “Take my life, for I am no better than my ancestors who have already died.” (NLT)

If even God’s mightiest men struggled, surely we can talk about it too. This stigma of men not being allowed to feel their feelings is not only unhealthy, it’s unbiblical.  God does not call men to be invincible, He calls us to be honest, especially about our weakness. This is something I have had to learn the hard way over the last few years.

I have always been able to rely on my own strength to get me where I needed to go, striving through adversity. I know where that strength comes from and give God all the glory, but still it was my hands doing the work and sometimes I got a little prideful. Then I got sick, then my body started to betray me. Nearly five years later the things I took for granted seem nearly impossible to me. It has been a humbling experience and taught me to look to others for help. I am not physically strong anymore, but spiritually, I am “Strong Yet Struggling”.

In 2 Corinthians 12:9, Paul writes about his struggles. He had a thorn in his side that caused him not end of frustration and grief so he begged God for help:

"But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me." (NLT)

Boasting of his weakness… Even boasting gladly! Admitting your struggles keeps you from losing strength and invites God’s power into your life, He can guide you and bring you peace. 

We are not made to fight every battle alone. We need brothers and sisters to walk with us when we are struggling, not just to lift weights with, but to lift burdens with. Isolation is a weapon of Satan to divide us and keep us from being shoulder to shoulder supporting each other and lifting those in pain to the foot of the cross. Even Jesus, in His darkest hour, called on Peter, James, and John to stay awake and pray with Him in Gethsemane. (Mark 14:32-34) So if the Son of God asked for support when in need, how much more do we need it?

Now, let me tell you a little story I call:

"The Stubborn Mule"

There once was a man who owned a mule. One day, the mule fell into a deep pit. The man looked down and said, "You got yourself in there; you can get yourself out." And of course, the mule tried but could not pull himself out.

Then the man’s friend came along, and seeing the mule in the hole he gave the mule a motivational speech. "Come on, buddy, believe in yourself!" The mule just stared at him.

Next, the man decided maybe the mule needed to "man up." So he started throwing dirt in to "toughen the mule up." But instead of getting out, the mule just got buried deeper.

Finally, the man called a few of his friends. Together, they built a ramp and placed one end into the hole the mule was in/. They all cheered and pulled and pushed the mule together and finally the mule was able to climb out.

Sometimes you cannot do it on your own. Sometimes you don’t need more "tough talk". What you need is real help, from Godly friends, and real action.Sometimes, you are the mule.

Whenever you are struggling, remember what Jesus said in Matthew 11:28,

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.” (NLT)

That includes the burdens nobody else sees. Real strength isn’t silence, real strength is surrendering to God and leaning into the community He’s given you.

Father God, help us to be men and women who aren't just tough, but tender-hearted, wise enough to ask for help, and strong enough to stand together.

In the name of Jesus, Amen